"...encourage the fainthearted, help the weak..."(1 Thessalonians 5:14)
"...help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He Himself said,
'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" (Acts 20:35b)
I didn't quite realize how much of a gift it is, to have the ability to encourage others in Christ, until my ability to encourage others, was severely limited. God had granted me many seasons of encouraging my Sisters & Brothers and building them up (1 Thessalonians 5:11)...so when a new season of weakness came into my life, it hit me hard! I was able to see just how blessed I had been when I was able to encourage others. It truly is more blessed to give than it is to receive!
But God has ordained a season for everything.
"...a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;...
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak..."
Ecclesiastes 3
I have been walking through a valley of grief for over a year now. A time of silence, weeping and mourning. Within the walls of my own home, God has given many blessings! I am thankful to God for my Husband and Son! So to outsiders, it has looked like a time of blessing. But very close to our home, just outside it's borders, circumstances "exploded", so-to-speak, in a manner that rocked my world! These circumstances affected the reality of my entire life, up until now, and really shook my faith in God and my understanding of truth. During this time, I doubted my salvation and lost hope in Christ. I slid more and more into a life of walking in the flesh, instead of walking in the Spirit. And without the constant help of the Spirit, as my Guide, I had little, in the way of hope, to offer anyone. My ability to point others to the Word at opportune times or pray with them was greatly weakened. I lost out on the joy of serving others!
God is graciously rebuilding the parts of my life that seemed at times, irreparable. I am still in the midst of regaining my footing. But I would like to encourage those who are strong in the Lord right now, to encourage your brothers and sisters who are currently faint of heart. Don't look on it as a burden, but as a gift!
We are admonished throughout Scripture to use any strengths we are given to serve others. "...by the strength that God supplies-- in order that in everything God may be glorified..."(1 Peter 4:8-11) I see with a new clarity, the "why" behind it. We are the Body of Christ and when one foot is impaired, we lean more heavily on the other foot. When one eye is not able to see, we squint and look through the other eye. If we can lean on one another, we will keep moving forward, toward the "finish line". We will keep on the narrow path! And no matter how "strong" we seem or how many people are leaning on us...it is the LORD who is is giving us the strength. So, although we are used as His vessel, and share in the joy of being used by Him, He gets the glory!
Whatever strengths He has given you today--use them!! I am saying this to myself as well! I still am wrestling depressive thoughts and anxieties and doubts. But God's Spirit lives within me, and He is bringing me into a season of "Spring"! I believe this is God's season to "build up" what had been broken down in me. And with every bit of strength God grants, I want to use it for HIS Kingdom! I know my Sisters in Christ need me, and I need them! "But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called 'today', that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." (Hebrews 3:13)
So, don't hide your talents! (Matthew 25:14-30) If you are in a season, where you have only been given one talent...by the power of the Spirit, use it! Ask God to help you to do well with whatever He has given you, in this season!
--"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13)
--"...My power is made perfect in weakness..." (2 Corinthians 12:9)
--"What do you have that you did not receive? If then you received it, why do you boast as if you did not receive it?" (1 Cor. 4:7)
And, to the fainthearted and weak, I urge you to not neglect the fellowship of believers. Let others know that your faith is weak. Let them pray for you and point you to God's truth! There isn't anything new under the sun. Your Sisters may have an understanding of what you are going through. And God can still use YOU to encourage THEM, even in your season of weakness! I was helped through the "desert" by my Husband, family members, close friends, Disciplers and Counselors (all who love the Lord). God used them as key instruments in my healing. And He still is! :-)
"And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near." (Hebrews 10:24,25)
To the ones who are strong in faith right now, ask God to keep you free of pride! And ask for the strength to keep on serving! Do not grow weary in doing good!
"And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith." (Galatians 6:9,10)
"Now may the God of peace who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great Shepherd of the sheep, by the blood of the eternal covenant, equip you with everything that you may do His will, working in us that which is pleasing in His sight, through Jesus Christ, to whom be the glory forever and ever. Amen." (Hebrews 13:20,21)
--Samantha Layland
For further encouragement:
http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/god-strengthens-us-through-others
Tuesday, April 4, 2017
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
What Are You Not Believing?
...without faith it is impossible to please Him..." (Hebrews 11:6)
Today God used a friend of mine and Scripture to show me the unbelief currently residing in my heart. As I studied unbelief, I was reminded again, of the seriousness of this particular sin. "Lord I believe, help my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)
What are you not believing?
What is it holding you back these days? Which of His promises have you let go of? What lie are you currently believing?
In Hebrews 11:6 we are told what it is we should believe:
"And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him."
When we believe God, it not only pleases Him, but it is counted as righteousness!
"...just as Abraham 'believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness'...it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham."
In Hebrews 3:12 we are warned to, "Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God."
That is a serious warning!
In Matthew Henry's commentary on Hebrews 3:12 he says,"An evil heart of unbelief is at the bottom of all our sinful departures from God; it is a leading step to apostasy; if once we allow ourselves to distrust God, we may soon desert Him."
I want to encourage you to examine your heart and trade in unbelief for faith in the Lord Jesus Christ! Here are some wonderful truths to stand on and to believe in with all of your heart!
Salvation:
~"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)
~"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:1)~"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation." (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Sanctification:
~"He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." (Philippians 1:6)
~"...for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." (Philippians 2:13)
God's Power:
~"I know that You can do all things and that no purpose of Yours can be thwarted." (Job 42:2)
~"for He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." (1 John 4:4)
~"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)
Truths to Give us Hope:
~"the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words." (Romans 8:26)
~Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ! (Romans 8:35-39)
~"I will not leave you or forsake you." (Joshua 1:5, Hebrews 13:5)
~"For everyone who has been born of God overomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world-our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?" (1 John 5:4,5)
Feel free to leave your favorite promises or passages you stand on in the comments below!
Bonus Material for your Encouragement:
1)
youtube.com/watch?v=dLKSYUJ9ysY
Today God used a friend of mine and Scripture to show me the unbelief currently residing in my heart. As I studied unbelief, I was reminded again, of the seriousness of this particular sin. "Lord I believe, help my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24)
What are you not believing?
What is it holding you back these days? Which of His promises have you let go of? What lie are you currently believing?
In Hebrews 11:6 we are told what it is we should believe:
"And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him."
When we believe God, it not only pleases Him, but it is counted as righteousness!
"...just as Abraham 'believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness'...it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham."
In Hebrews 3:12 we are warned to, "Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God."
That is a serious warning!
In Matthew Henry's commentary on Hebrews 3:12 he says,"An evil heart of unbelief is at the bottom of all our sinful departures from God; it is a leading step to apostasy; if once we allow ourselves to distrust God, we may soon desert Him."
I want to encourage you to examine your heart and trade in unbelief for faith in the Lord Jesus Christ! Here are some wonderful truths to stand on and to believe in with all of your heart!
Salvation:
~"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)
~"There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus." (Romans 8:1)~"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation." (2 Corinthians 5:17)
Sanctification:
~"He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." (Philippians 1:6)
~"...for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." (Philippians 2:13)
God's Power:
~"I know that You can do all things and that no purpose of Yours can be thwarted." (Job 42:2)
~"for He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." (1 John 4:4)
~"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)
Truths to Give us Hope:
~"the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words." (Romans 8:26)
~Nothing can separate us from the love of Christ! (Romans 8:35-39)
~"I will not leave you or forsake you." (Joshua 1:5, Hebrews 13:5)
~"For everyone who has been born of God overomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world-our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?" (1 John 5:4,5)
Feel free to leave your favorite promises or passages you stand on in the comments below!
Bonus Material for your Encouragement:
1)
youtube.com/watch?v=dLKSYUJ9ysY
Tuesday, October 13, 2015
Interview with Mandy Szabo (Part Two)
Interview with: Mandy Szabo
Topic of Discussion: Hospitality
*This 2nd part to our interview had to be paraphrased because my audio recording reached it's capacity and I had to revert to pen and paper.*
Mandy: God has been challenging me lately about what hospitality is. In the wider context of the New Testament, hospitality was Gospel-focused. Hospitality was shown to strangers; foreigners. When people traveled there weren't diners, there wasn't an inn. Hospitality was needed. That's been challenging to me, because hospitality is more about having people over who are strangers than just having your friends over.
I'm trying to be more biblical in my hospitality. Having people over, who can't repay you or it wouldn't be easy for them to. I'm seeking hospitality that is harder for me. Since Marc and I moved up here to Kentucky we've had about 10-15 internationals over! People from Nepal, India, China...
For most of these foreigners, dinner with us, was the first time they had ever had a meal in an American home! One of them has come to Christ! We shared the Gospel, to the best of our ability (due to the language barrier) and we prayed. Others who spoke Chinese fluently went deeper into discipleship with her.
We've had our deaf neighbors over. We don't sign. We had to find someone from a local church who was a Believer, who could sign, and they came to translate! We found out that this older, deaf couple are actually Christians and we got to hear their testimonies! We also found out their needs. They are older and have health problems and I'm in healthcare so I've been able to help them out. And Marc is an IT guy and their sole communication with others is via the Internet. When they have computer problems, they call Marc!
We had another older gentleman over; a neighbor of ours. And he isn't "easy" to have over because he is hard of hearing and he repeats himself a lot.
But I'm learning that you don't just show hospitality to those who are "easy". It will be challenging but a blessing in the end.
Sam: That is awesome! This is challenging stuff, but great!
Mandy, how would you encourage others to be more open with their homes?
Mandy: Hmm, I think the best thing to do is figure out why you don't want to. This is where my classes in Biblical Counseling come in! A few years ago, if you said "It's hard for me". I would have replied, "Just do it!". But now, I would say, examine yourself.
Do you feel inadequate? You are relying on yourself. You must lean on Christ!
Is it inconvenient? Christ washed the disciples feet. That was inconvenient. We need to be more like Christ!
I'd say, identify the barriers.
Bring it to Scripture.
Renew that thought with Scripture, making it submissive to God!
Think about how you want to feel in someone's home. The home doesn't need to be spotless. You are happy when someone loves you; to have a friend. Coffee shops are great, but people grow most in homes.
Sam: Good advice!
Mandy, what are some of your favorite verses pertaining to hospitality?
Mandy: Acts 18:26 when they took Apollos into their home. I know it doesn't go into much detail. But it looks like discipleship happening in the context of their home!
"He began to speak boldly in the synagogue. After Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him home and explained the way of God to him more accurately."
And then, I just heard a sermon recently on the passage from 1 Timothy 5, talking to the church about widows. And it speaks to the fact that godly widows should have "shown hospitality" in their younger years.
Sam: Thank-you so much Mandy, for your time and for sharing with us! It is very encouraging to see how God is working through you and your home!
If you would like to hear the sermon that Mandy referenced go to Kenwood Baptist's website, click on resources and search 1 Timothy 5:9-16 "Our Widows: Exemplars of Godly Womanhood." I listened to it and was encouraged further to use my energy, home and resources to bless others for the sake of God's Kingdom!
http://kenwoodbaptistchurch.com/resources/sermon-audio
Topic of Discussion: Hospitality
*This 2nd part to our interview had to be paraphrased because my audio recording reached it's capacity and I had to revert to pen and paper.*
Mandy: God has been challenging me lately about what hospitality is. In the wider context of the New Testament, hospitality was Gospel-focused. Hospitality was shown to strangers; foreigners. When people traveled there weren't diners, there wasn't an inn. Hospitality was needed. That's been challenging to me, because hospitality is more about having people over who are strangers than just having your friends over.
I'm trying to be more biblical in my hospitality. Having people over, who can't repay you or it wouldn't be easy for them to. I'm seeking hospitality that is harder for me. Since Marc and I moved up here to Kentucky we've had about 10-15 internationals over! People from Nepal, India, China...
For most of these foreigners, dinner with us, was the first time they had ever had a meal in an American home! One of them has come to Christ! We shared the Gospel, to the best of our ability (due to the language barrier) and we prayed. Others who spoke Chinese fluently went deeper into discipleship with her.
We've had our deaf neighbors over. We don't sign. We had to find someone from a local church who was a Believer, who could sign, and they came to translate! We found out that this older, deaf couple are actually Christians and we got to hear their testimonies! We also found out their needs. They are older and have health problems and I'm in healthcare so I've been able to help them out. And Marc is an IT guy and their sole communication with others is via the Internet. When they have computer problems, they call Marc!
We had another older gentleman over; a neighbor of ours. And he isn't "easy" to have over because he is hard of hearing and he repeats himself a lot.
But I'm learning that you don't just show hospitality to those who are "easy". It will be challenging but a blessing in the end.
Sam: That is awesome! This is challenging stuff, but great!
Mandy, how would you encourage others to be more open with their homes?
Mandy: Hmm, I think the best thing to do is figure out why you don't want to. This is where my classes in Biblical Counseling come in! A few years ago, if you said "It's hard for me". I would have replied, "Just do it!". But now, I would say, examine yourself.
Do you feel inadequate? You are relying on yourself. You must lean on Christ!
Is it inconvenient? Christ washed the disciples feet. That was inconvenient. We need to be more like Christ!
I'd say, identify the barriers.
Bring it to Scripture.
Renew that thought with Scripture, making it submissive to God!
Think about how you want to feel in someone's home. The home doesn't need to be spotless. You are happy when someone loves you; to have a friend. Coffee shops are great, but people grow most in homes.
Sam: Good advice!
Mandy, what are some of your favorite verses pertaining to hospitality?
Mandy: Acts 18:26 when they took Apollos into their home. I know it doesn't go into much detail. But it looks like discipleship happening in the context of their home!
"He began to speak boldly in the synagogue. After Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him home and explained the way of God to him more accurately."
And then, I just heard a sermon recently on the passage from 1 Timothy 5, talking to the church about widows. And it speaks to the fact that godly widows should have "shown hospitality" in their younger years.
Sam: Thank-you so much Mandy, for your time and for sharing with us! It is very encouraging to see how God is working through you and your home!
If you would like to hear the sermon that Mandy referenced go to Kenwood Baptist's website, click on resources and search 1 Timothy 5:9-16 "Our Widows: Exemplars of Godly Womanhood." I listened to it and was encouraged further to use my energy, home and resources to bless others for the sake of God's Kingdom!
http://kenwoodbaptistchurch.com/resources/sermon-audio
Tuesday, September 29, 2015
Interview with Mandy Szabo (Part One)
Interview with: Mandy Szabo
Topic of Discussion: Hospitality
If you don't already know Mandy Szabo, chances are, if you DO meet her, you will be invited over to her house for dinner that same night! ;-) And after dinner with Mandy, her Husband, Marc (of 4 1/2 years) and their one year old daughter Mabel, you will feel like family! The Szabos are a godly, Gospel-focused family that loves to share their joy... and their home with others! I was able to sit down and have a video chat with Mandy one afternoon and ask her some questions about hospitality. Our prayer is that you will be encouraged to open your home to outsiders after reading what Mandy had to say.
Sam: Mandy, was your family hospitable growing up?
Mandy :Yes. So, my Mom always encouraged people to be at our house. And we lived far away from our family. So we had our Grandparents down for a month at a time. Or we had our entire family down. We always had the resources to handle that sort of thing. We always had sleepovers at our house. She was always like, "Come to our house!" So she could know our friends and see who we hung out with and see what they were like. Every party, everything, was always at our house! For church, for cross-country growing up. People in high school knew that about our house. And there were MANY times,...few times...some times, they would even come over and I wasn't even there! Or like a ton of people would get there before me, because I am always late for everything! *laughter* "Oh yah, just come over to my house and I'll be over there when I can!". And they are over there eating our food and talking to my Mom or something. And one time they were playing video games with my little brother! It was just always, open door, all the time, always a ton of food! She always made extra of whatever food she was making incase someone was going to show up. That was just the way I always grew up.
Sam: That is awesome. And I feel like that liberty has definitely filtered down to you, because I always felt like going over to your house wasn't a burden to you. It's not like you were saying, "Oh, let me check my schedule. Let me make sure my house is perfect.", or "Let me check the cupboard, cuz, what am I going to feed you?". It wasn't a stress. It was, "Just come!".
Mandy: It's just natural.
Sam: Yep, natural.
Sam: Besides your own family were there any other influences that influenced you, as far as hospitality goes?
Mandy: I guess, my Grandmother also. I think it must run in the family. My Grandmother was the same way.
Sam: Your Mom's Mom?
Mandy: Yes, my Mom's Mom. She would always have cookies or something. She was always prepared. If you came to stay for a little while she would always have your bed made up and have little chocolates or little soaps laid out on your bed for you. Your towels all laid out. Just cute stuff like that.
And then, I think Mike Schadt, (Director of SOS Ministries) spending time with him, you learned hospitality, as far as missions goes. Hospitality is key to missions. When I went on missions before Mike Schadt, we were in people's homes but it wasn't the same as when we went with Mike. When you went into some one's home with Mike it was relaxed, a slow time. And that wasn't him being able to invite you in, but part of that is kind of how you get to know people, love people. Being in their homes, being with them for an extended period of time without having anxiety over having to leave for this or that.
Sam: It's kind of seeing the flip-side of it, with Mike Schadt. That is cool.
So, since you've been married, what has hospitality looked like in your home?
Mandy: I just wanna open my home; have people there. So, we would open it to anything for church. Like we always said we are willing to host if you need someone. Depending on the person, it can be a burden. And it never was for us. We've always enjoyed having things at our home. And Marc was the same way. He didn't grow up having anyone at his home, ever. But Marc also loves having people over and is very good at cleaning so that aided in the hospitality growth! *laughter* I'm not always very conscious of that, and Marc is!
I think it started with hosting things for church. And if we needed a bigger space we would work with my Mom and use her house. We just used the resources we had.
Sam: I met you at a Missions Meeting in your first small apartment with everyone crammed in there!
Mandy: Yeah, I always felt like it was never a struggle to have people to come to my home even if it wasn't large. It isn't about the size of your home or how incredible the meal is, but how you prepare your home.
Sam: Do you enjoy hospitality or do you kinda make yourself do it?
Mandy: Nope, I love it every time! I think your front door should be a revolving door...but have a latch! The door just keeps revolving and you just shut it sometimes when you need family time. Now that we have a child we face different challenges than we did before.
I read in a blog somewhere that hospitality and entertainment are two different things and sometimes we confuse the two. Hospitality is when you have someone over and you burn the rolls because you are so engaged in the conversation! There is a vulnerability and you make yourself an open book.
Sam: That is awesome! I love it! Alright, so what is some of the fruit you have seen from hospitality?
Mandy: I think from childhood it would be extended family, that wasn't blood related. We had a good friend of mine who had an eating disorder live with us for three months. Our home was a better environment for her at the time and she is a sister to me now. And she considers my Dad her Dad! So you gain family you didn't have before!
Topic of Discussion: Hospitality
If you don't already know Mandy Szabo, chances are, if you DO meet her, you will be invited over to her house for dinner that same night! ;-) And after dinner with Mandy, her Husband, Marc (of 4 1/2 years) and their one year old daughter Mabel, you will feel like family! The Szabos are a godly, Gospel-focused family that loves to share their joy... and their home with others! I was able to sit down and have a video chat with Mandy one afternoon and ask her some questions about hospitality. Our prayer is that you will be encouraged to open your home to outsiders after reading what Mandy had to say.
Sam: Mandy, was your family hospitable growing up?
Mandy :Yes. So, my Mom always encouraged people to be at our house. And we lived far away from our family. So we had our Grandparents down for a month at a time. Or we had our entire family down. We always had the resources to handle that sort of thing. We always had sleepovers at our house. She was always like, "Come to our house!" So she could know our friends and see who we hung out with and see what they were like. Every party, everything, was always at our house! For church, for cross-country growing up. People in high school knew that about our house. And there were MANY times,...few times...some times, they would even come over and I wasn't even there! Or like a ton of people would get there before me, because I am always late for everything! *laughter* "Oh yah, just come over to my house and I'll be over there when I can!". And they are over there eating our food and talking to my Mom or something. And one time they were playing video games with my little brother! It was just always, open door, all the time, always a ton of food! She always made extra of whatever food she was making incase someone was going to show up. That was just the way I always grew up.
Sam: That is awesome. And I feel like that liberty has definitely filtered down to you, because I always felt like going over to your house wasn't a burden to you. It's not like you were saying, "Oh, let me check my schedule. Let me make sure my house is perfect.", or "Let me check the cupboard, cuz, what am I going to feed you?". It wasn't a stress. It was, "Just come!".
Mandy: It's just natural.
Sam: Yep, natural.
Sam: Besides your own family were there any other influences that influenced you, as far as hospitality goes?
Mandy: I guess, my Grandmother also. I think it must run in the family. My Grandmother was the same way.
Sam: Your Mom's Mom?
Mandy: Yes, my Mom's Mom. She would always have cookies or something. She was always prepared. If you came to stay for a little while she would always have your bed made up and have little chocolates or little soaps laid out on your bed for you. Your towels all laid out. Just cute stuff like that.
And then, I think Mike Schadt, (Director of SOS Ministries) spending time with him, you learned hospitality, as far as missions goes. Hospitality is key to missions. When I went on missions before Mike Schadt, we were in people's homes but it wasn't the same as when we went with Mike. When you went into some one's home with Mike it was relaxed, a slow time. And that wasn't him being able to invite you in, but part of that is kind of how you get to know people, love people. Being in their homes, being with them for an extended period of time without having anxiety over having to leave for this or that.
Sam: It's kind of seeing the flip-side of it, with Mike Schadt. That is cool.
So, since you've been married, what has hospitality looked like in your home?
Mandy: I just wanna open my home; have people there. So, we would open it to anything for church. Like we always said we are willing to host if you need someone. Depending on the person, it can be a burden. And it never was for us. We've always enjoyed having things at our home. And Marc was the same way. He didn't grow up having anyone at his home, ever. But Marc also loves having people over and is very good at cleaning so that aided in the hospitality growth! *laughter* I'm not always very conscious of that, and Marc is!
I think it started with hosting things for church. And if we needed a bigger space we would work with my Mom and use her house. We just used the resources we had.
Sam: I met you at a Missions Meeting in your first small apartment with everyone crammed in there!
Mandy: Yeah, I always felt like it was never a struggle to have people to come to my home even if it wasn't large. It isn't about the size of your home or how incredible the meal is, but how you prepare your home.
Sam: Do you enjoy hospitality or do you kinda make yourself do it?
Mandy: Nope, I love it every time! I think your front door should be a revolving door...but have a latch! The door just keeps revolving and you just shut it sometimes when you need family time. Now that we have a child we face different challenges than we did before.
I read in a blog somewhere that hospitality and entertainment are two different things and sometimes we confuse the two. Hospitality is when you have someone over and you burn the rolls because you are so engaged in the conversation! There is a vulnerability and you make yourself an open book.
Sam: That is awesome! I love it! Alright, so what is some of the fruit you have seen from hospitality?
Mandy: I think from childhood it would be extended family, that wasn't blood related. We had a good friend of mine who had an eating disorder live with us for three months. Our home was a better environment for her at the time and she is a sister to me now. And she considers my Dad her Dad! So you gain family you didn't have before!
To be continued...
Monday, September 28, 2015
Abraham's Birth Story (Part 2)
...continued
So my story left off with Brian and I in the car driving to the Birth Center. Our drive was thankfully only about 15 minutes long and my contractions were tolerable while in the car. We arrived around 5:30 AM. Brian walked with me from the car to our room at the Center. We stopped a couple times as I worked through the contractions as they came. Brian was extremely supportive and gentle. He listened carefully to what I needed.
The Birth Center was quiet and empty. My Midwife, Vicki was waiting for us. She had filled up the bath tub and had the lights dimmed. I believe some soft music was playing.
Vicki had me lay down on the bed so she could check my dilation and administer an IV since I had tested positive for Strep B. I was 4 cm and fully effaced. I was happy to hear that. But I also was concerned we had come in too soon. I relayed my thoughts to Vicki who kind of laughed and said she was glad I was there! (Abe was born less than 3 hours later!) Laying down on my back and side during those few minutes was awful. I could not have labored entirely on my back! I was dying to get back on the floor! While she finished up with me, Brian set up a soft blanket on the floor, right by a rocking chair. This would be my "laboring station" until I got into the tub.
Once on the floor I remember my contractions seemed to be intensifying to the point where I wanted Brian nearby. He sat on the edge of the bed and I leaned on him or held onto him while working through each rush on my knees. They were 2-3 minutes apart and 50 seconds long.
It wasn't long and Vicki suggested I move to the tub. I was eager because I needed some kind of relief.
From this point on, my contractions grew in intensity.(Most of my time references from here on out are from my Vicki's notes). All I could do was breathe and moan through each one. I would use the brief moments between rushes to recover and prepare for the next one. Brian would give me a sip of water through a straw when I needed it. I would go from laboring on my knees to laying back in the tub allowing my arms and hands to float in the warm water. My eyes were closed. I was concentrating. I was praying. I was thanking Vicki and Brian for helping me because I felt I couldn't do it without them. Brian played "Holy Wedding Day" for me (that was the song I walked down the aisle to). :-) Vicki told us we needed to stop or she was going to cry.
6:30 AM--I now was feeling "pressure" down yonder. I believe this is when I began to dread each contraction. As I would feel one coming on, I would say "oh no". At some point once in the tub, Vicki thought to push on my lower back with her hand. It was such a blessing from God. Vicki was pretty spot-on and got it every time. She showed Brian where to push when I was having a contraction, but I felt he didn't always get the exact spot. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I also was limited in how much I could talk, so I kept that to myself.
As the labor progressed and everything became more and more painful I became a little anxious and fearful. "How am I going to make it through the next one?", would go through my head. Or, "When is the next contraction? Oh God, please give me more time". At some point I began to ask for prayer. I think Vicki and Brian spoke powerfully to me in short sentences. They would tell me I was doing a good job. They would pray. I would say, "I can't do this." And Vicki would say, "You ARE doing this." :-) By the end of my labor I was yelling out loud, "God help me!". I was serious!
I had begun praying about labor all the way back around 30 weeks of my pregnancy. I knew only my Heavenly Father could get me through labor. My desire had been to have a very prayerful labor and it was!
7:59 AM--I finally had bloody show. My contractions had become overwhelming. The pressure was very strong. I think I told Vicki "I feel like I'm pushing" around 7:30 AM and it progressed to me saying, "I'm pushing!!". I was scared. My contractions took over my body and with each one my body was bearing down and pushing the baby out! My moaning turned to yelling (which is very embarrassing to me, but it is what it is). :-) The yelling seemed to be the only way to cope with the pain. Imagine pushing a car, up a hill. You would not do it silently. I could not push this kid out quietly! ;-) Vicki asked if I needed to go to the bathroom. As soon as she asked, I realized I needed to go!
Vicki and Brian helped me out of the tub and onto the toilet. I faced backwards and layed my head on the tank. I relieved myself, both #1 and #2 and my water broke with an intense gush (thankfully on the toilet). I believe it was on the toilet when my yelling turned to screaming during contractions.
While on the toilet, Vicki told us she saw the head!
She suggested I go back to the tub or the bed. At that moment I didn't really care where I was. I couldn't fathom moving. As I moved back to the tub I had a contraction on my knees of the bathroom floor. After that one, Brian and Vicki hoisted me back into the tub somehow!
Once I was back in the water Brian asked Vicki a question that has now become our funniest story ever!! :-D
Brian: "Do I have 30 seconds to go to the bathroom?"
Vicki: "A quick 30 seconds!"
I was thinking to myself..."Why can't you just use this toilet?" And then I remembered Vicki was there! :-) After he left I had a terrible contraction and I remember yelling at the top of my lungs...."Briiiiiaaaaannnnn!". I wanted to make sure he knew the baby was coming and he needed to get back to me! :-)
We think Abe was delivered less than 2 minutes after Brian came back into the room!!
I delivered Abe while kneeling and leaning over the side of the tub. Once he was delivered I was able to sit down in the water. Vicki brought Abe up out of the water and placed him on my chest! It was over! I was still in pain! But our son was here! Labor was over!
I remember just catching my breath and being so thankful it was over! I still hurt and wished I could be free of pain. But the hard part was over and I had survived!!
Labor began: 1:00 AM
Abe was born: 8:13 AM
8 lbs. 14 oz
21 inches
And he came on July 4th!
..."call upon Me in the day of trouble;
I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me."
-Psalm 50:15
"But I call to God,
and the Lord will save me".
-Psalm 55:16
So my story left off with Brian and I in the car driving to the Birth Center. Our drive was thankfully only about 15 minutes long and my contractions were tolerable while in the car. We arrived around 5:30 AM. Brian walked with me from the car to our room at the Center. We stopped a couple times as I worked through the contractions as they came. Brian was extremely supportive and gentle. He listened carefully to what I needed.
The Birth Center was quiet and empty. My Midwife, Vicki was waiting for us. She had filled up the bath tub and had the lights dimmed. I believe some soft music was playing.
Vicki had me lay down on the bed so she could check my dilation and administer an IV since I had tested positive for Strep B. I was 4 cm and fully effaced. I was happy to hear that. But I also was concerned we had come in too soon. I relayed my thoughts to Vicki who kind of laughed and said she was glad I was there! (Abe was born less than 3 hours later!) Laying down on my back and side during those few minutes was awful. I could not have labored entirely on my back! I was dying to get back on the floor! While she finished up with me, Brian set up a soft blanket on the floor, right by a rocking chair. This would be my "laboring station" until I got into the tub.
Once on the floor I remember my contractions seemed to be intensifying to the point where I wanted Brian nearby. He sat on the edge of the bed and I leaned on him or held onto him while working through each rush on my knees. They were 2-3 minutes apart and 50 seconds long.
It wasn't long and Vicki suggested I move to the tub. I was eager because I needed some kind of relief.
From this point on, my contractions grew in intensity.(Most of my time references from here on out are from my Vicki's notes). All I could do was breathe and moan through each one. I would use the brief moments between rushes to recover and prepare for the next one. Brian would give me a sip of water through a straw when I needed it. I would go from laboring on my knees to laying back in the tub allowing my arms and hands to float in the warm water. My eyes were closed. I was concentrating. I was praying. I was thanking Vicki and Brian for helping me because I felt I couldn't do it without them. Brian played "Holy Wedding Day" for me (that was the song I walked down the aisle to). :-) Vicki told us we needed to stop or she was going to cry.
6:30 AM--I now was feeling "pressure" down yonder. I believe this is when I began to dread each contraction. As I would feel one coming on, I would say "oh no". At some point once in the tub, Vicki thought to push on my lower back with her hand. It was such a blessing from God. Vicki was pretty spot-on and got it every time. She showed Brian where to push when I was having a contraction, but I felt he didn't always get the exact spot. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. I also was limited in how much I could talk, so I kept that to myself.
As the labor progressed and everything became more and more painful I became a little anxious and fearful. "How am I going to make it through the next one?", would go through my head. Or, "When is the next contraction? Oh God, please give me more time". At some point I began to ask for prayer. I think Vicki and Brian spoke powerfully to me in short sentences. They would tell me I was doing a good job. They would pray. I would say, "I can't do this." And Vicki would say, "You ARE doing this." :-) By the end of my labor I was yelling out loud, "God help me!". I was serious!
I had begun praying about labor all the way back around 30 weeks of my pregnancy. I knew only my Heavenly Father could get me through labor. My desire had been to have a very prayerful labor and it was!
7:59 AM--I finally had bloody show. My contractions had become overwhelming. The pressure was very strong. I think I told Vicki "I feel like I'm pushing" around 7:30 AM and it progressed to me saying, "I'm pushing!!". I was scared. My contractions took over my body and with each one my body was bearing down and pushing the baby out! My moaning turned to yelling (which is very embarrassing to me, but it is what it is). :-) The yelling seemed to be the only way to cope with the pain. Imagine pushing a car, up a hill. You would not do it silently. I could not push this kid out quietly! ;-) Vicki asked if I needed to go to the bathroom. As soon as she asked, I realized I needed to go!
Vicki and Brian helped me out of the tub and onto the toilet. I faced backwards and layed my head on the tank. I relieved myself, both #1 and #2 and my water broke with an intense gush (thankfully on the toilet). I believe it was on the toilet when my yelling turned to screaming during contractions.
While on the toilet, Vicki told us she saw the head!
She suggested I go back to the tub or the bed. At that moment I didn't really care where I was. I couldn't fathom moving. As I moved back to the tub I had a contraction on my knees of the bathroom floor. After that one, Brian and Vicki hoisted me back into the tub somehow!
Once I was back in the water Brian asked Vicki a question that has now become our funniest story ever!! :-D
Brian: "Do I have 30 seconds to go to the bathroom?"
Vicki: "A quick 30 seconds!"
I was thinking to myself..."Why can't you just use this toilet?" And then I remembered Vicki was there! :-) After he left I had a terrible contraction and I remember yelling at the top of my lungs...."Briiiiiaaaaannnnn!". I wanted to make sure he knew the baby was coming and he needed to get back to me! :-)
We think Abe was delivered less than 2 minutes after Brian came back into the room!!
I delivered Abe while kneeling and leaning over the side of the tub. Once he was delivered I was able to sit down in the water. Vicki brought Abe up out of the water and placed him on my chest! It was over! I was still in pain! But our son was here! Labor was over!
I remember just catching my breath and being so thankful it was over! I still hurt and wished I could be free of pain. But the hard part was over and I had survived!!
Labor began: 1:00 AM
Abe was born: 8:13 AM
8 lbs. 14 oz
21 inches
And he came on July 4th!
..."call upon Me in the day of trouble;
I will deliver you, and you shall glorify Me."
-Psalm 50:15
"But I call to God,
and the Lord will save me".
-Psalm 55:16
Tuesday, September 15, 2015
Abraham's Birth Story (Part 1)
Before I gave birth to my first son, Abe, I wanted to know as much about labor & delivery as possible! With a non-medicated labor as my goal, I figured ignorance couldn't be bliss! ;-) So I read labor stories, asked every mother I met about their labors, took classes at my Birth Center and asked my Mom about her labors for the umpteenth time!
If you are pregnant or want to have a baby one day, maybe you like to hear about the process. The details of how a baby goes from living inside of his Mom to greeting the world! Since every labor & delivery story are different I feel that the more stories you hear, the better! You want to get a good overview of the long labors, the short, hospital births, birth center & home births, water deliveries and your occasional "side of the road" birth!
I would like to share my journey, in hopes that it will encourage...or atleast entertain you! ;-) So, here is the story of how not-so-little Abe came into this world on the Fourth of July!
To begin with, I had a lot of braxton hicks contractions in the latter part of my pregnancy. I was still waiting tables four days a week and the walking really brought on a lot of cramping and contracting. At 30 weeks I was sent to the hospital by my Midwife because one evening they were coming very frequently (I believe they were 3-5 min apart) and I couldn't get them to dissipate. By the time we arrived at the hospital they were abating & I checked out just fine! After that, my Midwives and I figured out that I just had a uterus that liked to contract a lot! The next 10 weeks were full of episodes similar to the first (minus the drive to the hospital). The last "episode" before real labor came six days before his birth. For about 5 or 6 hours I had a lot of Braxton Hicks (some got to be painful). I was very uncomfortable. And as quickly as it came on, they went away.
Abraham was due on Sunday, July 5th. He came on Saturday, July 4th. On the Friday before he was born I was very tired and took a nap. That evening I remember being quite uncomfortable (which wasn't uncommon during my 3rd trimester!). :-P My Husband was giving me a "history lesson" as we watched a documentary and I remember barely being able to concentrate on what he was saying due to my menstrual-like backache & crampy Braxton Hicks. By the time I was going to bed he could tell I wasn't acting like myself and he asked me if I thought this was "it". After having so many bouts with Braxton Hicks and "false alarms" I played it cool and passed it all off as normal end-of-pregnancy symptoms.
11:00 PM: Went to bed.
1:00 AM: I woke up having Braxton Hicks and feeling pressure "down-yonder". I went to the bathroom. From my notes that I typed on my contraction app, I think I had what felt like a "rush" when I came back to bed. (I had been reading stories from Ina May's book and they refer to contractions as "rushes".) All of a sudden I knew what they meant when they called them "rushes" because it came from my back and wrapped around my midsection to my belly in a rush of crampy pain!
1:47 AM: I began to log the contractions on my app. (They were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting an average of a minute)
1:56 AM: Moved from my bed to the couch. Beginning to experience some very painful contractions.
2:09 AM: Texted my sister Chris that I may be in labor. Then I went 3 minutes without a contraction & began to doubt myself. And then, boom! A hard one hit!
2:15 AM: Went to the bathroom to go #1 because the contractions were hard enough that I was afraid I would wet my pants! :-) During a contraction I laid my head on the counter and closed my eyes. When I opened my eyes again, my vision was blurry. I remembered my Mom had always said that her vision got blurry during transition so this worried me (even though I still wasn't fully convinced this was ACTUAL labor! ) ;-)
2:24 AM: Contractions were lasting 40-60 seconds on average and coming every 1 1/2- 3 minutes apart. In my notes I typed, "I cried just now bcuz the reality of this is hitting...if this is for real, we will meet Junior soon."
2:41 AM: Took a shower because I wasn't sure if I'd be able to later if this was labor. And they tell you to shower during "early labor" in Birth Class. Wrote in my notes that I had 3 contractions in the shower and they had been "shorter, easier ones...maybe bcuz of warm water?"
3:00 AM: Woke up Brian. I didn't want to have a "false alarm" so I made sure he knew I still wasn't 100% sure this was the real thing. He suggested I call the Midwife. I bargained, and asked if I could just call my Mom instead! (I didn't want to call the Midwife needlessly. I knew my Mom could help me determine if this was "real".) Contractions are consistently 1 1/2- 2 1/2 minutes apart and usually lasting 30-40 seconds.
3:24 AM: From notes- "Called Mom. Had maybe 3 light ones. Hit with a doozy where I put down phone....told Mom I had to go. Went to toilet had another doozy."
4:17 AM: My contractions were 1 1/2- 2 minutes apart and lasting closer to a minute long again. From notes-"Called Mom. Told her to tell KT and F. B has called Vicki. We r gonna go soon."
KT and F are my two youngest sisters. B is my Hubby and Vicki our Midwife.
4:57 AM: I stopped timing contractions on my app and no longer took notes.
Before we left, Brian was so sweet and neatened things up around the house. He also read the list I had made him and packed his bag. He made the call to the Midwife around 4 AM for me and I remember being surprised that Vicki didn't ask to talk with me. (They usually ask to speak to the Mom in labor to guage how far along they are.) At that point I was on the floor, leaning across our rocking chair's ottoman, moaning and breathing through the contractions.
We had a 15 minute drive to the Birth Center and I was able to labor sitting in the front seat, buckled in! I was so thankful to God, because I had been laboring on my hands and knees or standing, leaning on bathroom or kitchen counters. I had called my sister Chris (or maybe she called me?) in Canada, right before we left our house. I told her I was in labor. I had to put the phone down during every contraction & ended up hanging up on her saying I had another one coming! Chris knew I was getting close because she later told me I was extremely focused. She also said we were only on the phone for a couple minutes and I had a few contractions...basically I was having them more frequently than I had told her! I asked her to pray over our drive because I was concerned about not being able to be on my hands and knees. She prayed. And God was gracious! The car ride wasn't too bad. I pushed my head back against Abe's car seat and my head rest (somehow that helped me). I think Brian prayed for me on our drive as well! I know my parents were praying too! I was covered in prayer!
To be continued...
If you are pregnant or want to have a baby one day, maybe you like to hear about the process. The details of how a baby goes from living inside of his Mom to greeting the world! Since every labor & delivery story are different I feel that the more stories you hear, the better! You want to get a good overview of the long labors, the short, hospital births, birth center & home births, water deliveries and your occasional "side of the road" birth!
I would like to share my journey, in hopes that it will encourage...or atleast entertain you! ;-) So, here is the story of how not-so-little Abe came into this world on the Fourth of July!
To begin with, I had a lot of braxton hicks contractions in the latter part of my pregnancy. I was still waiting tables four days a week and the walking really brought on a lot of cramping and contracting. At 30 weeks I was sent to the hospital by my Midwife because one evening they were coming very frequently (I believe they were 3-5 min apart) and I couldn't get them to dissipate. By the time we arrived at the hospital they were abating & I checked out just fine! After that, my Midwives and I figured out that I just had a uterus that liked to contract a lot! The next 10 weeks were full of episodes similar to the first (minus the drive to the hospital). The last "episode" before real labor came six days before his birth. For about 5 or 6 hours I had a lot of Braxton Hicks (some got to be painful). I was very uncomfortable. And as quickly as it came on, they went away.
Abraham was due on Sunday, July 5th. He came on Saturday, July 4th. On the Friday before he was born I was very tired and took a nap. That evening I remember being quite uncomfortable (which wasn't uncommon during my 3rd trimester!). :-P My Husband was giving me a "history lesson" as we watched a documentary and I remember barely being able to concentrate on what he was saying due to my menstrual-like backache & crampy Braxton Hicks. By the time I was going to bed he could tell I wasn't acting like myself and he asked me if I thought this was "it". After having so many bouts with Braxton Hicks and "false alarms" I played it cool and passed it all off as normal end-of-pregnancy symptoms.
11:00 PM: Went to bed.
1:00 AM: I woke up having Braxton Hicks and feeling pressure "down-yonder". I went to the bathroom. From my notes that I typed on my contraction app, I think I had what felt like a "rush" when I came back to bed. (I had been reading stories from Ina May's book and they refer to contractions as "rushes".) All of a sudden I knew what they meant when they called them "rushes" because it came from my back and wrapped around my midsection to my belly in a rush of crampy pain!
1:47 AM: I began to log the contractions on my app. (They were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting an average of a minute)
1:56 AM: Moved from my bed to the couch. Beginning to experience some very painful contractions.
2:09 AM: Texted my sister Chris that I may be in labor. Then I went 3 minutes without a contraction & began to doubt myself. And then, boom! A hard one hit!
2:15 AM: Went to the bathroom to go #1 because the contractions were hard enough that I was afraid I would wet my pants! :-) During a contraction I laid my head on the counter and closed my eyes. When I opened my eyes again, my vision was blurry. I remembered my Mom had always said that her vision got blurry during transition so this worried me (even though I still wasn't fully convinced this was ACTUAL labor! ) ;-)
2:24 AM: Contractions were lasting 40-60 seconds on average and coming every 1 1/2- 3 minutes apart. In my notes I typed, "I cried just now bcuz the reality of this is hitting...if this is for real, we will meet Junior soon."
2:41 AM: Took a shower because I wasn't sure if I'd be able to later if this was labor. And they tell you to shower during "early labor" in Birth Class. Wrote in my notes that I had 3 contractions in the shower and they had been "shorter, easier ones...maybe bcuz of warm water?"
3:00 AM: Woke up Brian. I didn't want to have a "false alarm" so I made sure he knew I still wasn't 100% sure this was the real thing. He suggested I call the Midwife. I bargained, and asked if I could just call my Mom instead! (I didn't want to call the Midwife needlessly. I knew my Mom could help me determine if this was "real".) Contractions are consistently 1 1/2- 2 1/2 minutes apart and usually lasting 30-40 seconds.
3:24 AM: From notes- "Called Mom. Had maybe 3 light ones. Hit with a doozy where I put down phone....told Mom I had to go. Went to toilet had another doozy."
4:17 AM: My contractions were 1 1/2- 2 minutes apart and lasting closer to a minute long again. From notes-"Called Mom. Told her to tell KT and F. B has called Vicki. We r gonna go soon."
KT and F are my two youngest sisters. B is my Hubby and Vicki our Midwife.
4:57 AM: I stopped timing contractions on my app and no longer took notes.
Before we left, Brian was so sweet and neatened things up around the house. He also read the list I had made him and packed his bag. He made the call to the Midwife around 4 AM for me and I remember being surprised that Vicki didn't ask to talk with me. (They usually ask to speak to the Mom in labor to guage how far along they are.) At that point I was on the floor, leaning across our rocking chair's ottoman, moaning and breathing through the contractions.
We had a 15 minute drive to the Birth Center and I was able to labor sitting in the front seat, buckled in! I was so thankful to God, because I had been laboring on my hands and knees or standing, leaning on bathroom or kitchen counters. I had called my sister Chris (or maybe she called me?) in Canada, right before we left our house. I told her I was in labor. I had to put the phone down during every contraction & ended up hanging up on her saying I had another one coming! Chris knew I was getting close because she later told me I was extremely focused. She also said we were only on the phone for a couple minutes and I had a few contractions...basically I was having them more frequently than I had told her! I asked her to pray over our drive because I was concerned about not being able to be on my hands and knees. She prayed. And God was gracious! The car ride wasn't too bad. I pushed my head back against Abe's car seat and my head rest (somehow that helped me). I think Brian prayed for me on our drive as well! I know my parents were praying too! I was covered in prayer!
To be continued...
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
Grab Some Pens & Highlighters!
I recently found a wonderful project that John Piper has launched on Desiring God. It is called "Labs" or "Look At The Book".
I personally found it helpful as I am more of a visual or hands-on learner. I already underline key phrases and verses in my Bible, write out definitions to words that stump me and sometimes add a little colored ink to really hone in on a point! The way Piper slowly dissects the Word is a good example, teaching us to process each word/phrase and it's meaning.
Check it out for yourself! And here is a link to a passage I personally have really clung to over the last few years!
http://www.desiringgod.org/labs/what-will-please-god
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